By: Rashid Ateye
Wednesday September 2, 2026
"O you who believe! Protect yourselves and your families from a Fire whose fuel is people and stones..." (Surah At-Tahrim 66:6)
There are moments in the life of every community when we must pause and ask ourselves difficult questions. Not to criticize. Not to point fingers. But to reflect honestly on where we are and where we are heading. Today, I believe we are facing one of those moments.
This is not about saying that every young Somali girl is misbehaving. Many are respectful, ambitious, modest, and making their families proud every day. They deserve recognition and encouragement. Rather, this is about acknowledging that some young people—girls and boys alike—are facing growing pressures from social media, peer influence, unhealthy relationships, and environments that can expose them to exploitation and poor choices.
If we truly care, then silence is no longer an option. Fathers Must Return to Their Place of Leadership. The first question we should ask is not: "What is wrong with our daughters?"
Instead, we should ask: "Have we fulfilled our responsibility as fathers, mothers, families, and a community?"
Allah says: "O you who believe! Protect yourselves and your families from a Fire..." (Surah At-Tahrim 66:6) Protection is not only about providing food, clothing, and school fees. It is also about protecting faith, character, dignity, and emotional well-being.
The Prophet ﷺ said: "Each of you is a shepherd, and each of you is responsible for those under his care." (Sahih al-Bukhari & Sahih Muslim) A father is not only a provider of money. He is a teacher, a mentor, a protector, a listener, a role model. Many fathers work tirelessly to support their families, and that sacrifice deserves respect. Yet in today's world, financial provision alone is not enough. Our children also need our time, our attention, our guidance, and our presence.
The World Has Changed
Our children are growing up in a world very different from the one many parent knew. A mobile phone can introduce a teenager to influences from across the globe within minutes. Social media often celebrates attention rather than modesty. Peer pressure can make harmful behavior appear normal. Predatory adults may exploit loneliness, insecurity, or a desire to belong. This reality affects boys and girls alike. Ignoring these changes will not protect our children. Preparing them to navigate them wisely will.
The Example of Luqman
Allah preserved the advice of Luqman to his son in the Qur'an, giving parents an enduring model of guidance. "O my son, establish prayer, encourage what is right, forbid what is wrong, and be patient over what befalls you." (Surah Luqman 31:17)
Notice that Luqman did not simply issue commands. He taught, he explained, he advised, he loved, he remained involved. This is the parenting model our communities need today.
We Must Stop Reacting and Start Leading: Many parents only become involved after something has gone wrong. Instead, we should lead before problems arise. Ask your daughter:
• Who are your closest friends?
• What challenges are you facing?
• What are your dreams?
• What makes you happy?
• Is anyone making you uncomfortable?
• What support do you need from me?
Ask without anger, listen without interrupting, guide without humiliating, a daughter who trusts her father is far more likely to seek his advice before making a life-changing mistake.
Community Problems Require Community Solutions. Families cannot solve this challenge alone. The entire community must become part of the solution.
1. Establish Fathers' Forums
Every neighborhood should organize monthly gatherings where fathers discuss:
• Parenting challenges
• Teenage development
• Online safety
• Islamic upbringing
• Mental health
• Building stronger relationships with children
Strong fathers build strong families. Strong families build strong communities.
2. Create Community Action Groups
Volunteers can organize practical programs that support families by:
• Identifying young people who need mentoring.
• Organizing educational talks and family events.
• Helping parents access advice and support.
• Connecting youth with positive role models.
• Working with mosques and schools on youth initiatives.
These groups should encourage rather than police, and support rather than shame.
3. Develop Mentorship Programs
Responsible, well-trained women and men of good character can mentor younger girls and boys. Young people often listen to someone who has recently walked the same path.
Mentorship can focus on:
• Islamic character (Akhlaq)
• Modesty and self-respect
• Education and career planning
• Leadership
• Confidence
• Responsible use of technology
• Healthy friendships and relationships
4. Organize Activities That Inspire
Young people need places where they belong. Communities should organize:
• Sports and fitness activities
• Qur'an circles
• Leadership camps
• Volunteer projects
• Career workshops
• Public speaking clubs
• Reading circles
• Entrepreneurship training
When young people have purpose, they are less likely to seek belonging in harmful places.
5. Ask the Difficult Questions
If we see concerning trends, we should ask honest questions:
• Are parents spending enough quality time with their children?
• Are families eating together?
• Are we teaching Islamic manners as consistently as academic success?
• Do our children feel safe talking to us?
• Are we modeling the behavior we expect?
• Are we creating opportunities for healthy recreation?
Finding the root causes is more productive than assigning blame. Protecting Our Daughters Means Building Their Strength. Protection does not mean isolating girls from society. It means equipping them to live with faith, wisdom, confidence, and dignity wherever they are.
Teach them:
• Their value comes from Allah, not public attention.
• They should never feel pressured to compromise their principles.
• Education and ambition can go hand in hand with modesty.
• Healthy boundaries are a sign of strength, not weakness.
• If they ever face pressure or danger, home should always be a safe place to seek help.
Our Sons Also Need Guidance
The conversation cannot stop with daughters. Our sons must also be taught respect, responsibility, self-control, and honorable conduct. A community that raises righteous young men creates a safer environment for everyone.
The Prophet ﷺ was sent to perfect noble character, and that responsibility belongs to all of us.
Our Legacy
Years from now, our children will not remember how much money we earned. They will remember whether we listened. Whether we guided, whether we loved, whether we were present, whether we taught them to know Allah. If every father becomes more involved, every mother feels supported, every mosque opens its doors to youth, every respected elder mentor a few young people, and every family chooses guidance over silence, our community can build a generation that is confident, compassionate, and firmly rooted in faith. Our daughters are not a burden to manage, they are a trust (amanah) from Allah.
May Allah grant our parents wisdom, our youth righteousness, our homes tranquility, and our community unity.
______________________________
Ameen.
R. Ateye
